Sack of Flour!

10/23

As we are getting closer to Daddy’s Birthday and to Halloween, I jokingly asked him this morning what he wanted to be, he shook his head and told me he doesn’t even like Halloween. This surprised me because not only is Daddy a Halloween baby but he has a bit of a warped sense of humor. I can recall the song he sang to me most growing up was “The Last Kiss.”  Which is about a young couple that go on a date and are involved in a car accident, the girl ends up dying in his arms. He also loved Earth Angel and other sad and tragic songs, stories and events. I remember much of my childhood being spent begging Daddy to tell us stories, which we knew would have a frightening element to them. He told us of a headless horseman that would chase him through the various fields in Sandy, and would often drive us past the "haunted" house which was just down the street from where he grew up. There wasn't a time we passed that Daddy didn't say, "Did you see the rocking chair moving back and forth on its own?"  He had another classic tale about a man with no legs who would swing in the trees and chase girl scouts around for dinner. Story telling is something my father has always been great at and is a gift I am not sure he is even aware that he has. So in discussing Halloween I mentioned to him my surprise and he said it just wasn't his favorite Holiday and that even as a child it was not. Kailee Bug called us tonight as she does every night and we happen to be in the middle of this conversation so I asked her what she was going to be her response was one of panic, she was not sure yet and asked Daddy what she would be, without hesitation he said she should be a sack of flour! What?! Where did he come up with this? Bugs and I were laughing and he was very serious and he told her it was better than being Zorro for 6 years in a row like he was. He said Grandma made him where the same costume every year only buying him a new sword with each new year, when she stopped buying the sword he just went without and was a pirate instead for the next 6 years...we all laughed and now I understand why he hated Halloween, but either way Halloween is right around the corner, I guess we will see what Bugs comes dressed as. After our conversation with Bugs we started talking about the event of tomorrow. It is Daddy's second week of Chemo.  He is a little nervous  mostly because he has been doing so well after his first round that he is concerned what a second week might bring. His appetite has not changed he still doesn't want to eat but tries his best to force himself anyway. He often feels a little fatigue and nausea but those are the worst side effects experienced so far. We pray he continues to be strong both physically, mentally and spiritually.  I love him and am so proud of him for all that he has endured so far. It has to be challenging to stay positive when faced with so much at once and at times I do seem him sinking into those moments of thought and it breaks my heart to see my big strong Daddy feeling so weak, but he is much stronger and much more courageous than I could ever be and I know that whether he chooses to recognize that or not it gives the rest of us the hope we need so that we might be able to provide the encouragement and support that he needs.